Trait Hoarder

In Search of Legends — Part 3

First, I checked the Dokkaebis’ condition.

Their robes were all filthy.

Dust-covered and stained, their once-white garments had turned a dull yellow.

‘No wonder the female Dokkaebis are avoiding them.’

Imagine going on a blind date.

And your date shows up in unwashed, stinking clothes.

With greasy, matted hair and breath that could kill a man.

You’d be chasing down the matchmaker, demanding an explanation.

“Huh?”

“Kim West… you into that kinda stuff?”

“Shut up and hand them over. I’m doing your laundry.”

“We know how to wash clothes too…”

“You’re telling me this is washed?”

I forcibly stripped them.

Starting with the strongest one, Dango-ma.

He screamed and tried to run, but there was no escaping me—not when I had Grand Assault equipped.

Once I got one, the rest was easy.

Dango-ma, now furious, turned on the others and ripped their clothes off himself.

“Dango-ma! Are you a Dokkaebi or a water ghost?!”

“That’s right! I’m a water ghost! Hurry up and strip!”

“Damn it!”

“I don’t wanna do laundry!”

“You’re not doing it! Kim West is! Just take it off!”

“Shit!”

As the robes came off, their undergarments were revealed—

And they were even worse.

So bad that I didn’t even want to describe them.

Yeah… I wasn’t washing those.

They could handle that themselves.

They had Dokkaebi Clubs, didn’t they? A tap with that, and poof—good as new.

I stacked the robes beside the well, forming a mountain of cloth.

Up close, the stench was overwhelming.

It wasn’t just a bad smell—it was an assault on my senses, sharp and pungent.

Seo Woojin instinctively covered his nose and backed away.

“Uh… Teacher? Do I have to help with this?”

“No, just focus on your mana training. The mana density here is higher than the Mana Concentration Chamber, so you’ll get better results.”

“Yes, sir!”

That was all I needed to say.

Seo Woojin bolted to a safe distance, sat cross-legged, and began circulating his mana.

Thud! Thud-thud!

I had come prepared.

From my golf bag, I pulled out detergent and a laundry bat.

Using a washing machine was out of the question.

Hand-washing was the only way.

I drew water from the well, filled a large basin, poured in the detergent, and dunked the robes inside.

Then, I started hammering them with the laundry bat.

‘Might as well grab some housekeeping traits while I’m at it.’

I had acquired cooking skills easily, but other household-related traits had been elusive.

I’d been too busy running around.

But considering my efforts so far, I was confident I could secure at least two.

Dishwashing, organizing, and disposal were still uncertain, though.

[Giant’s Strength] [One-Man Army] [Combat Mastery]

[Thor Cultivation Technique] [Onslaught] [Acceleration]

Thwack! Thwack-thwack-thwack! Thwack-thwack-thwack!

I struck with vigor, syncing my traits with my attack speed and hammering away.

The robes trembled as if they were about to tear.

But, as expected of enchanted garments, they withstood the punishment.

Water splashed everywhere, evaporating on impact and rising in a misty cloud.

“That’s Kim West for you.”

“The lady Dokkaebis are gonna fall head over heels for him.”

“Look at that color! It’s perfect!”

“Bright white! So clean!”

I was using high-grade magical detergent.

Just mixing it with water made it evaporate on contact, maximizing efficiency.

It worked better than industrial washing machines and dryers from my world.

Naturally, the robes turned pristine white.

Less than an hour in, most of them were done.

Then—

I felt it.

My laundry bat was moving with supernatural precision.

[Acquired the trait: Laundry.]

I finished the rest of the robes and tossed them back to the Dokkaebis.

Each one landed perfectly on its rightful owner.

No chance of confusion—every Dokkaebi had a unique build.

“Whoa! Thanks a ton!”

“So soft and fluffy!”

“It’s like brand new!”

“But… I swear I washed this just yesterday. Why does it look so different?”

Different?

Because you guys barely did anything.

Leaving your clothes out to dry and slapping them a few times wasn’t laundry.

Hand-washing with detergent was basically resurrection in comparison.

I clapped my hands twice to get their attention.

“Bring me the trays! Time to do the dishes!”

“Ugh…”

“So much work…”

“Can’t you just do everything, Kim West?”

“Are you saying you don’t want to get married? If you don’t cooperate, I won’t play matchmaker.”

“Ugh!”

“Fine, fine!”

Dokkaebis were notoriously lazy—except when it came to pranks.

But the moment I mentioned matchmaking, they scrambled to their feet.

They piled everything next to me—

Half-eaten trays of pork and kimchi, makgeolli bowls, and empty drinking cups.

Next up, dishwashing.

I pulled out magic dish soap and a sponge from my golf bag.

[One-Man Army] [Combat Mastery] [Thor Cultivation Technique]

[Onslaught] [Acceleration] [Swift]

Adjusting my traits slightly, I started scrubbing.

I went at the dishes with unrelenting force.

Scrubbing so hard it was like I was sanding down a battle-scarred blade.

The grease buildup was horrendous.

It wasn’t just pork and kimchi stains—

There was some mysterious black residue caked onto the dishes.

Now that I thought about it, I had a strong stomach.

I had eaten off these filthy plates without a second thought.

Then again…

After developing God’s Tongue, chewing licorice candies, and stuffing my face into surströmming just to gain Keen Nose, my resistance to gross things had turned ironclad.

Shutting off all thought, I continued scrubbing.

The Dokkaebis watched in silence.

Then, one by one, they brought over more dishes.

Not just trays, but rice bowls, soup bowls, side dish plates, and even sauce jars and kimchi pots.

A literal mountain of dirty dishes stacked beside me.

“Phew.”

I exhaled deeply and kept scrubbing.

This wasn’t just dishwashing.

It was a full-scale deep cleaning operation.

If my hands hadn’t suddenly sped up unnaturally, and if old stains and rotten grime hadn’t begun melting away at my touch, I might’ve been stuck here all night.

[Acquired the trait: Dishwashing.]

Faster than I expected.

Guess that was the power of high-level stats and a Dokkaebi-infused environment rich with mana and inspiration.

Two traits in quick succession.

I was on a roll.

Having completely finished the dishes, I stood tall and declared with enthusiasm.

“Next up—deep cleaning! Everyone, grab a broom and a mop!”

“Can’t Kim West just do it for us…?”

“You guys don’t want to get married? You know what happens when the sun rises, right?”

The Dokkaebis flinched.

The Dokkaebi realm only existed for one night.

Once the sun rose, everything here would vanish like an illusion.

And I would be forcibly expelled.

I could re-enter the next night, but I’d have to start from scratch.

Did I really want to go through all of this again?

No way.

This had to be a one-shot success.

I couldn’t afford to mess around, grinding some pointless “Patience” trait while infinitely resetting.

If I got kicked out at sunrise, I’d probably end up on tomorrow’s news.

The best course of action was coaxing the Dokkaebis into cooperating, completing the Gunslinger Ruins, and escaping through the portal that appeared afterward.

“Let’s get married!”

“Let’s do this!”

“If Kim West leaves, who knows when he’ll come back?!”

“Tonight is the night we get married!”

“Aja! Aja! Aja!”

Finally, the Dokkaebis rolled up their sleeves.

Some of them even transformed back into their true forms—

Brooms.

…Yeah. Some Dokkaebis were actually just enchanted brooms.

Others turned into mops.

But me?

I didn’t need any of that.

I pulled out my Magic Vacuum Cleaner from my golf bag.

This thing could suck up dust and mop the floor at the same time—no need for primitive tools.

VROOOOOM!

I started with the biggest house.

There were a total of ten houses in the Dokkaebi village.

I had to finish them all before sunrise.

Thankfully, time flowed slower here, giving me some leeway.

But considering how useless the Dokkaebis were, the deadline was still tight.

Seo Woojin hovered awkwardly nearby.

“Teacher, do you need help? You said we have to finish before morning.”

“No, just focus on your mana training.”

“You sure?”

“I’m sure. This is a personal challenge. You felt it earlier, right? How personal challenges make you stronger?”

“Yes.”

“This is the same. You helping would actually slow me down. This realm isn’t easy to enter, so focus on getting stronger.”

“Understood. But let me know if you need more hands.”

The inside of the house was a disaster.

Junk everywhere.

They had piled up food waste in one corner and just thrown a cloth over it like that would somehow make it disappear.

When I grimaced and glared at them, the Dokkaebis awkwardly looked away.

“All we need is a Dokkaebi Club!”

“With that, we can fix everything!”

“No need to clean at all!”

What a bunch of lazy idiots.

Even if you had a magic club, you shouldn’t be this bad at daily life.

But I looked on the bright side.

This was all free experience points.

More traits for me.

If I thought of it as them messing up on purpose just so I could get more traits, then even the rotting garbage and dust-covered furniture seemed… bearable.

[Mars Swordsmanship] [Master of the Sword] [Thor Cultivation Technique]

[Mana Soul] [Mana Core] [Mana Recovery]

I charged in at full speed.

Did Mars ever imagine?

That his swordsmanship techniques—the experience of a god of war—would be used for deep cleaning?

He definitely didn’t.

But it was insanely effective.

With Master of the Sword enhancing my precision, I blitzed through the mess like a lightning bolt.

Every spot the vacuum touched gleamed.

Under furniture, between cracks, deep in corners—

Nowhere was safe from me.

I dug in ruthlessly, leaving nothing but spotless surfaces.

Even though my magic vacuum cleaner was just a high-end item, in my hands, it might as well have been a divine weapon.

Thud! Thud-thud!

I mercilessly threw out piles of trash.

“Wait! You can’t throw that away!”

“Then go fix it with your magic club later!”

“Ugh! Blegh! It got in my mouth!”

“Then maybe you should’ve cleaned up earlier! Pile all the trash together—we’re burning it all!”

The Dokkaebis grumbled but helped anyway.

If they wanted to get married, they had no choice.

Clean clothes, clean houses, clean bodies.

That was the minimum requirement.

Once the first house actually started looking livable, the Dokkaebis finally got moving.

They ran to the well and doused themselves with water.

And since they were magical beings, just that simple act instantly cleaned them up.

Their hair dried, their skin brightened, and their faces became fresh and youthful.

At this point, my movements sped up even more.

[Acquired the trait: Cleaning.]

Forget Swordmaster—I might as well be Cleaning Master at this rate.

I flew through the rest of the houses like a storm.

Wiping, scrubbing, vacuuming, mopping.

By the time I finished—

“Phew!”

I wiped the sweat from my forehead and looked eastward.

No sign of dawn yet.

Barely safe.

The only thing left was disposing of the trash.

Fwoosh!

I ignited the flames.

Bright red fire roared out of me, like a flamethrower.

[Hellfire] [Thor Cultivation Technique] [Mana Soul]

[Mana Core] [Mana Recovery] [Mana Absorption]

The garbage burned beautifully.

Non-flammable waste?

Irrelevant.

This was Hellfire.

As long as I had mana, it could burn through anything.

Even Black Flame couldn’t match its instant destructive power.

As expected, the entire mountain of garbage turned to ash in seconds.

‘Didn’t work, huh…’

I picked up a handful of ash and clicked my tongue.

I had deliberately used Hellfire instead of Black Flame for one reason—

[Disposal]

The last housekeeping trait I needed.

I figured my casual habit of tossing trash away too easily had slowed my progress.

From now on, I’d burn everything myself.

‘Alright. Cooking, cleaning, laundry, dishwashing—all done…’

Two were still missing.

Organization and Disposal.

‘Not urgent, though.’

The main goal was [My Home], a compound trait formed from all housekeeping traits.

Essentially, it was a base-building trait.

When set up in a location, it provided huge stat bonuses, experience boosts, and skill proficiency gains.

Perfect for training.

Perfect for battle.

And since I had a base-type mount—the Sky Ship— it was even more valuable.

“We’re ready!”

“All set!”

“Time to get married!”

The Dokkaebis spun in circles, their freshly cleaned robes fluttering.

One even planted his head in the ground and started spinning on his head.

A Dokkaebi spun in place, balancing on his arms while kicking his legs in wide circles.

Another did a handstand, bouncing on his palms like a spring.

They were all dressed in traditional hanbok, but the way they danced was pure breakdancing—a ridiculous sight.

“Yo!”

“Kim West, get in here!”

“Join us!”

I jumped in.

[Dance]

This single trait was all I needed.

The only dance I had actually learned was idol choreography, but breakdancing wasn’t out of the question.

The trait would handle the rest.

I adjusted my traits slightly and started dancing among the Dokkaebis.

Faster.

Stronger.

More intense.

The Dokkaebis burst into laughter.

“Kim West! You’re incredible!”

“This is legendary!”

“Did we just pull an SSR-tier Kim West?!”

Seo Woojin, looking awkward, tried bouncing to the beat.

But the Dokkaebis were ruthless.

“Booo!”

“Stop that!”

“You’re not a Kim West! You’re a damn oni from the eastern islands, aren’t you?!”

Still, the condition was fulfilled.

Every Dokkaebi and every human in the Dokkaebi realm was dancing.

And then—

Rumble.

The ground trembled.

“It’s starting!”

“Kim West, we’re counting on you!”

The vibration was like a massive temple bell ringing.

Like boiling magma, the earth churned and bubbled.

Then, blue and red lights burst from the ground.

Dozens of beams shot into the sky and hovered in midair.

From a distance, they would look just like cheongsilhongsil—the traditional blue and red wedding threads.

“Cheongsilhongsil!”

“Time to get married!”

“I just want to get married! It’s my lifelong wish!”

“I’ve been a single Dokkaebi for 500 years! If this keeps up, I’m gonna become a Buddha and ascend!”

I quickly scanned the floating lights.

At first glance, they all looked the same.

But up close, there were subtle differences.

Each light had protrusions and indentations.

Each at different intervals, in different shapes.

For example, one blue thread might have △-shaped bumps, while a red thread had matching △-shaped hollows.

Or the opposite.

I had to match as many as possible within the time limit.

If even one of the three factors—shape, number, or spacing—was off, the threads wouldn’t connect.

And those two Dokkaebis wouldn’t find a match in this cycle.

I cracked my knuckles.

Goal: Full Marriage Completion.

The more successful matches, the bigger my reward.

“Hup!”

I jumped.

Snatched the nearest blue thread.

And slammed it against a matching red thread in the distance.

The two lights wriggled—

Then wrapped around each other, twisting like two snakes entwining.

“Please, please…!”

Dango-ma clasped his hands together in prayer.

Ah.

So the first match was his.

I ignored him.

There were plenty more threads to connect.

I landed, then leaped again.

This time, I grabbed a red thread and linked it to a nearby blue one.

Over and over.

Dozens of times.

When I had matched more than half—

A roar erupted behind me.

“They’re connecting!”

“It worked!”

“We’re getting married!”

“Dango-ma’s getting married!”

“Thank you, Kim West! Thank you so much!”

Not yet.

No premature celebrations.

I finished linking every last thread before landing.

Then, I turned around.

The Dokkaebis stared at me in stunned silence.

Their mouths hung open.

Every single Dokkaebi in the Dokkaebi realm.

As expected.

Flash! Flash!

The connected cheongsilhongsil threads radiated brilliant white light.

Not just one or two.

Not just ten or twenty.

Exactly one hundred.

The exact number of Dokkaebis present.

Full completion.

Everyone was getting married.

–TL Notes–

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