Echoes of My Heart Throughout the Court

[“Of course, the most urgent matter is to find someone first!”]

Officials: “!!!”

They certainly had female relatives around, but…

Choosing between wearing a green hat (cuckoldry) or showing patriotic loyalty was truly a difficult decision!

—Whether it’s putting the hat on themselves or on their son-in-law, brother-in-law, or sister’s husband, it’s utterly explosive no matter how you look at it!

[“If worse comes to worst, find a man? After all, whether it’s pills or potions, these inanimate objects shouldn’t be smart enough to differentiate gender, right?”]

The officials, who had been touching their heads, immediately switched to covering their rear ends.

This… This…

Wasn’t the risk of loyalty just increased by a billion-fold?

One particular 69-year-old senior censor, who had been loyal and patriotic his entire life, suddenly had his struggling expression harden into one of resolve.

“Your Majesty!”

“This old servant is ready!”

Hahahhaha, imagining this scene have me in laughing fits.

With creaky joints, he started arduously climbing the mountain.

---

The old emperor still hadn’t realized he had such a loyal subject.

At this moment, he was just hesitating, uncertain, and his gaze fell on the Ministry of War’s clerk and Ji Sui.

Maybe… use one of them?

The two men’s expressions tightened, and the pain in their rear ends seemed to flare up again in waves. Both of them were one step away from losing control.

The old emperor: Forget it, dragging ministers into the royal bed wouldn’t sound good if word got out.

He then turned his gaze to the gentleman.

Just a moment ago, he thought this person was perfect in every way: eloquent, morally aligned, and of pure character. But now…

His gaze gradually became more critical.

This man smelled too fragrant—how many sachets had he stuffed into his clothing? The scent was overwhelming.

And his face, powdered to look whiter, was excessively effeminate.

Furthermore…

The gentleman was struggling to hold in his need to urinate, his face alternating between green and red.

Could it be… the emperor realized he was about to lose control?

“Sir!!!” Xu Yanmiao suddenly raised his voice.

The gentleman’s face twisted, his urge to pee nearly bursting out from the shock.

The old emperor spoke with difficulty, “What is it?”

Xu Yanmiao: “I have an idea.”

The old emperor: “I think I know what your idea is… but… let me think about it some more.”

A straight man for life, being suddenly asked to “take” a man—it was a psychological hurdle he couldn’t overcome.

…Physiologically, it might also be an impossible leap.

[“What?! The old emperor guessed it? And he still needs to think about it? Well, I suppose… taking matters into his own hands in public, even for an emperor…”] ṚÅ𐌽ő฿Êṥ

Take matters into his own hands?

The old emperor abruptly sat up straight.

Ji Sui’s eyes lit up with delight.

The Ministry of War clerk swayed slightly as he got up, looking for a place to go.

All three were suddenly ecstatic: this idea might work!

---

The gentleman, utterly dumbfounded, watched as the four men dashed off. “??? What’s going on?! Ji Gong, why are you leaving too?! Look at me, Ji Gong!”

“…Fine.” He struggled to stand up, searching for a spot. Once he finished his personal business, he’d go find His Majesty and Ji Gong!

---

Xu Yanmiao covered his ears and eyes, turning his back to them. [“Don’t worry! I won’t look or listen!”]

The three men: “…”

Enough! You might as well just stand guard openly!

In this situation…

The three exchanged awkward glances.

Then, they each sat down on opposite sides of a tree, back to the trunk, unable to see each other.

About a quarter of an hour later, all three had more or less finished.

But…

The old emperor sat there expressionless, not moving.

Ji Sui leaned against the tree, resting his eyes.

The Ministry of War clerk looked conflicted, his face full of torment.

None of the three budged, locked in a stalemate.

Another quarter of an hour passed before the Ministry of War clerk, tears of frustration streaming down his face, stood up.

A little while later, Xu Yanmiao’s inner thoughts came through—he himself was chatting with the Ministry of War clerk.

[“Two quarters of an hour was enough?”]

[“Is that a long time or a short time?”]

The old emperor and Ji Sui stared coldly at the air ahead of them.

Yes, that’s why they hadn’t stood up yet.

—As for the Ministry of War clerk, both of them were higher-ups he couldn’t afford to offend. He had no choice but to sacrifice his own reputation.

Another quarter of an hour passed.

The old emperor discreetly massaged his numb backside.

Ji Sui flexed his tired legs.

Half an hour later…

The old emperor gritted his teeth, determined not to make any sudden movements.

Ji Sui’s pupils momentarily flickered with struggle.

He couldn’t embarrass the emperor, but… this was a matter of male pride…

But then again…

Never mind. Half an hour was enough.

Ji Sui wobbled to his feet.

The old emperor was overjoyed.

If Ji Sui managed half an hour, surely I can hold out for an hour and show my vigor!

One hour later…

Xu Yanmiao’s inner voice chimed in.

[“Still not done?”]

[“Is this really that long-lasting?”]

[“Huh? Why are so many officials lingering on the mountainside without moving? Could it be they discovered the emperor’s presence here, want to pay their respects, but don’t want to expose his location, so they’re planning some kind of staged encounter?”]

[“But this many people? The emperor’s not stupid.”]

The old emperor, who had just decided he’d held on long enough and could stand up, immediately sat back down.

One hour? That’s not enough!

Those officials are all watching!

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