Susan lay on her bed naked, masturbating while thinking about her son. She'd been at it for over an hour. She'd even called Suzanne and delayed their usual morning exercise session, simply because she was so aroused that she couldn't stop playing with herself. I've turned into a complete slut, and I don't care! This whole thing about boundaries - that's fine and dandy for Suzanne maybe, but I don't give a damn! I can't wait till he gets back home from school. I suppose I'll have to share, since today is supposed to be Suzanne's day to be alone with him. ... Share his sweet, ripe, full, hard COCK!
I suppose it's only fair to share. After all, Suzanne is almost his second mother. She's spent so many countless hours over the years helping him turn into the wonderful young man he is today. It's only fair that she gets to be his busty cocksucking mommy too. Mmmm! That's hot! "Busty cocksucking mommy." I just love the sound of that! Hee-hee!
But I'm going to seduce him and get him to have sex with me, and soon! I may go to Hell for it, but I don't care! And I know he wants it too. Dammit, I'm gonna use the 'F' word! He's gonna fuck me! He's gonna fuck me in every room of the house, on every piece of furniture! And then we'll do it outside, and in public places. Glass elevators! He'll slam me against the glass in a high building, and everyone will watch from below!
And then Suzanne and I will fuck him together! We'll make a fuck sandwich! And then I'll fuck her! I'll go sixty-nine with my best friend! And then we'll all take turns fucking and licking Angel, and we'll have one big fuck-fest! We'll have a fucking orgy, and then we'll serve Amy's sweet fucking pie for desert! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!
She sat up in bed and her hair flew in every direction as she completely abandoned herself to her urges and desires in an orgasmic frenzy. She finally vocalized her thoughts, and the cry "Fuuucck meeeee!" echoed throughout the house as she had a powerful climax. The sight of her huge breasts bouncing in the air would have been enough to turn any gay man straight, had one been lucky enough to observe it.
But after she came down from her orgasmic high, Susan felt quite depressed.
This keeps happening to me, she thought in a completely different mindset. I get lost in an erotic fantasy about Tiger, and then I completely regret it and take it all back, but only after I orgasm. And then I do it again. I've already masturbated three times since he left for school today. I'm totally obsessed.
And these thoughts I'm having are too disturbing. I went way overboard with him yesterday and this morning. If there was any line of moderation, where one could actually dispassionately suck someone's penis, I think I've blown past it already. Heck, I almost stroked his exposed member right in front of Angel this morning! As a matter of fact, if I'm honest with myself, I did! Oh, the shame! Yesterday was just the icing on the cake.
And I had more sexual dreams of Tiger last night. Crazy, weird, extremely erotic dreams. This latest fantasy about fucking, even thinking about Angel - it's way beyond the pale. This has to stop! I feel so dirty I literally should be flogged with whips to punish my evil thoughts. Only problem is, I'd probably enjoy it, ha-ha. But her laughter was ironic.
She realized that it was as if a dam had burst in her mind. She had been sexually repressed for too long, and now it was all coming out, and Alan was the only target.
She decided, The only thing I can do, what I MUST do, is take a short vacation. I've got to get out of here before Alan gets home. I need to spend the rest of the day somewhere else to give myself a chance to cool down. As it is now, I'm on the verge of losing all control. Actually, I've lost control already and have to get it back. In the state I'm in, if I were to see him again, I don't know if I'd have the control to not just shout out, "Fuck me until I pass out!"
She was trying to decide when and where she should go, or if she should just stay home and succumb to her desire to masturbate some more, when the phone rang.
She picked it up. "Hello?" She recognized the voice on the other end of the line. Damn, it's my husband! "Oh, hi darling!" she said to Ron in a falsely happy tone.
Suddenly, a whole wave of emotions washed over her. In the past few weeks she'd almost forgotten that she even had a husband, and now she felt intensely guilty. How could I be such a bad wife? I've been cheating on him. Cheating! I'm so horrible! He didn't do anything to deserve the way I've been behaving!
They talked for a few minutes. The big news was that Ron would return home from his job in Asia in a few days. It was Wednesday and he would be arriving Saturday morning, just three days away. He would be staying at home for twelve days before he returned to Asia.
That was a longer than usual home visit, especially for this time of year. He usually tried to come home for the Christmas holidays, spending a couple weeks at that time, plus one or two visits of a week or less at other times of year. But he wasn't sure if he could make the holidays this year, so he had chosen to take more time now.
Susan kept the call short, since she felt so bad talking while in the nude with cum running down her thighs. She hung up the phone and cried. She cried until it seemed she had no more tears to cry. Then she got up and put on her old, conservative clothes - bra, panties, and all.
This is a sign from God, she said to herself. This is God's way of saying I have fallen, and I have to get back on track. I had my fun with Tiger, but that's all over now. God is forgiving - he can forgive me for my heinous sins if I truly repent. I just have to hold out for three days and then, once my husband is here, I have two weeks to cool down and straighten out my life. If Suzanne wants to keep pleasuring Alan, that's her business, but not in my house, and not at all while Ron is in town!
I've just seen the abyss of utter sexual depravity, and I've stepped back from the edge. Yesterday I was so close to going all the way with my own son. I would have gladly spread my legs for him if it weren't for that face he made that scared me and kept me from doing something horrible. The fact is, I just don't have the self-control to maintain the proper boundaries. So as much fun as all this has been, this can't go on! It's just too wrong! There's more to life than just stroking and stroking and licking and licking and taking that big erection deeper and deeper and deeper still! And having my wonderful baby boy play with my boobs as he shoves his hard rod into the back of my throat.
Her words were making her more aroused again.
Either that or I could lie here and masturbate again. Maybe just one last time, before I give it up. It's not like I'd hurt anyone else with a little more self-pleasure.
No! I have to stop! I'm a sinner and an adulterer. This is WRONG! I have to save my soul from burning in Hell if it's not already too late. I need to tell everyone how things are going to be from now on before I change my mind.
She picked up the phone and called Suzanne.
Suzanne could tell a crisis was brewing and came over right away.
By the time Suzanne got there, Susan had already dressed in her prudish clothes and made herself somewhat presentable.
She quickly explained the problem, emphasizing the phone call. She finished by saying, "Suzanne, I need you to give it to me straight. I'm an adulterer, a cheat, a bad mother, an incestuous pervert, and worse! What else am I leaving out? I'm a freak! I don't deserve to live!" She sobbed into Suzanne's chest.
Suzanne replied, "Susan, I'm your best friend, am I not? I understand what you're feeling, but I think you're overreacting."
"Overreacting?! Suzanne, I'm obsessed! I've gone mad. I've completely lost my mind! All I can think about is squeezing more and more sperm from my son's delicious member! Tell me I'm not mentally disturbed."
"I know it comes as a shock, and yes, you have become a bit obsessed, but that's because you've had such a profound change happen to you in the last week or so. Your libido, your sex drive, has finally awoken. I'm beginning to think that you've lived your entire life up until this point almost like some kind of virgin. You've had sex, yes, but nobody ever lit your fire. And now that your fire is burning, you don't know how to control it - how to turn it off when you need to."
Susan let out a world-weary sigh while her tears continued to fall. "That's all true, but it's so WRONG! My husband should be the one to set me on fire and turn my libido into a raging inferno. My HUSBAND! Not my son, for crying out loud! He's gonna divorce me for sure, as soon as he finds out, and then I'll be out on the street and never able to see my darling children again. And I'll deserve it!"
She stood up, and clutched at herself. "It's this body of mine! I can't control it! Even now, it still feels all ... tingly. It's got a mind of its own, a depraved, sinful mind. Even now, when you said I was almost like a virgin, you know what came into my mind?"
"What?"
"That I was pure for my son! That he'd really like that, that my body is just for him to use. And it made me ... horny. So horny! Darn it, just explaining it to you right now is making me tingly all over again. But I'm so guilty and tortured, too. Suzanne, this is killing me!"
She suddenly bent over. "Help me! Make the tingling stop!"
Then she stood back up and buried herself in Suzanne's embrace even more than before. She let loose with a bigger bout of sobbing.
As she cried, she tried to explain, "The problem is, I love my cutie Tiger so much! So very, very much! If it was anyone else, I could control myself. Easily! ... But... But ... the chance ... to love my son ... in a new way... Oh, Suzanne! It brings me so much joy! I just can't help it! I love it! But I hate it too! It's so wrong! So very, very wrong!"
As Suzanne held her and tried to comfort her by stroking her hair, she thought, Uh-oh. We've got a big-time problem here. And Ron is coming back in three days, she says, which is absolutely horrible timing. How am I going to fix this?
Suzanne let Susan bewail her circumstances for an hour or more until Susan was emotionally exhausted and out of tears. Suzanne even cried a lot herself in sympathy. But then she got down to the business of straightening Susan out.
Sitting next to her on a sofa, Suzanne said, "It's good to let it all out, but now that you're done with that let's try to work things out. First of all, things aren't as bad as you think they are; you're just reeling from the shock of so much change in your life. Let's look at the positives."
"Positives? What positives?!"
pαпdα-ňᴏνê|·сóМ "Well, for one, you've finally unleashed your sexual side. True, it was unleashed when you were with your son, but that doesn't mean that it'll only come out with him. Let's take an honest look at your marriage. It's been a pretty loveless and sexless marriage, hasn't it?"
"I wouldn't exactly say it's THAT bad," Susan protested.
"Susan, who do you think you're talking to? I know everything. I was there just about every moment since you got married. In fact, you've probably spent much more than ten times as much time with me as you have with your husband during the course of your marriage; he's simply never around. Things have not been good, you have to admit it. And why haven't they? Good sex is key to a good marriage; that's just a fact. I hate to be blunt, but you've been so sexually repressed that you've been a cold fish in bed. Ron must be horribly, horribly frustrated sexually. No wonder he takes jobs out of town all the time."
Susan wailed, "I'm so horrible! And now I'm cheating on him."
"I'll bet you dollars to donuts that he's sleeping around every chance he gets."
"What?!"
"Think about it. He IS human. He DOES have a sex drive. How many times do you two have sex in a given year? Twice? Three times? What kind of man would be satisfied with that and not ask for a divorce unless he has other sexual outlets?"
"Oh God! Suzanne, you may be right, but that's so horrible. Why are you telling me this now? You're hitting me when I'm down. I thought you were talking about the positives."
"I am. Frankly, I've assumed that he's been cheating on you for years now; I've seen all the signs. I've tried to warn you in different ways, but you wouldn't listen. The plus side is, obviously he must still have some feelings for you or he would have divorced you a long time ago. What's been missing in your marriage has been a sexual spark, or really any kind of sexual anything for that matter. Now, you've awoken. Now, you realize how good sex can be and that sex for reasons other than procreation is not a sin. So you can use those new feelings and knowledge to revive your marriage!"
Susan sniffled. "I can? Do you think?"
"Of course you can! And I'm going to help!" Suzanne added to herself, Help to make sure that never happens, that is. The last thing I want is to get Ron back in the picture. I have my reasons to suspect that'll never happen no matter what she does, but I'll have to make sure it doesn't just the same. Still, the "old Susan" needs something like that to hold onto for a while, as she slowly adjusts to the new reality Sweetie and I are making for her.
"So what should I do? I'll do ANYthing to make it up to Ron, all these horrible things I've done!" She gasped. "Oh dear Lord! Just the things I did this morning! So SHAMELESS!"
"Well, before you feel so bad, keep in mind it's almost 100 percent certain that Ron has been cheating on you FOR YEARS. If you want evidence of that, I can give you a long list."
Susan frowned. "Are you sure?! That's a very serious accusation!"
Suzanne nodded sadly. "Very sure. Now's not the time to go into it, but I'm working on making a rock solid case. Remember, I've cheated on my husband for a long time too, and maybe there's truth in the saying that it takes one to know one. What you did in the past day or two is a drop in the bucket compared to what he's done to you."
"That may be, but I feel so guilty. I hold myself to a high standard. What's more important than living a pure life, one that the Lord would approve of? My parents didn't raise me to be a cheater."
"First off, you're not even cheating. You're helping your son's medical condition. You're saving him from sin to boot! I'll bet if Ron knew, he'd be upset at first, yes, but he'd also be impressed at your selfless sacrifice."
"NOOO! Ron can never know!"
"I didn't say he has to know. I'm just saying that what you're doing might not even upset him that much. Did it upset Katherine? No. Amy? No. Me? No. Alan? Obviously not. What you're doing is a GOOD thing, a kind thing, a-"
"But it has to stop, Suzanne! It just has to!"
"Well, take a break, certainly, and see how you feel in a day or two. I'll try to carry on by myself in helping with Sweetie's medical treatment. Don't worry; we all love you, and together we'll solve any problem, be it your marriage, your son's ailment, your shock at your sexual awakening, or whatever else may arise."
Susan flung herself at Suzanne and hugged her tightly. "You're the best! The best, best friend ever! Thank you so much!" She resumed crying, but more just from being emotionally overwhelmed than from sadness.
Then Suzanne brought up an argument she'd been holding as a kind of ace up her sleeve for a difficult time like this. "Wait, I'm not done. One more thing. Let's talk about masturbation - the terrible sin of Onan!"
Susan shook her head. "I've been thinking a lot about the sin of Onan today. That makes me feel a little better, that at least Tiger hasn't spilled his seed much. But that's not nearly enough to justify my wanton and sinful behavior!"
Suzanne said, "'Better to plant your seed in the belly of a whore than on the ground.' Have you ever heard that expression?"
Susan was stunned into silence. After a long pause, she said, "As a matter of fact, I have. I haven't heard it for years and years, though. That's something people used to say back in Nebraska to warn against the evils of masturbation."
"Do you know where it's from?"
"Hmmm. It sounds like Scripture. But I've read the Bible from cover to cover many times, and I don't recall actually coming across it."
Suzanne had been hoping to pass it off as being directly from the Bible, but she realized she couldn't do that. So she said, truthfully, "It's not a direct quote from the Bible, but it's basically a summary of the Biblical story of Onan, Judah, and Tamar, which of course is where the sin of Onan story comes from. As you may remember, Onan masturbates and is struck dead by God, whereas Judah has sex with a prostitute and goes unpunished. So one can rightfully conclude that it's 'better to plant your seed in the belly of a whore than on the ground.'"
"I suppose that's true," a thoughtful Susan replied.
"Think about that wording," Suzanne directed. "'Plant your seed in the BELLY of a whore.' Belly means the stomach, obviously, and the only way to get cum into the stomach is through oral sex. In other words, a blowjob from a whore is better than masturbation. Of course, you're not a whore. You're a mother, and a mother is way better than a whore. So it also stands to reason that a blowjob from one's mother is much better than masturbation. See? What you did is NOT a sin, NOT a bad thing. You're saving him from sin each and every time, just like I keep telling you. It's proven in the Bible by that well-known saying!"
Susan was flabbergasted by that. She wanted to believe it so much that she overlooked a few logical leaps. "WOW! Suzanne... you're a genius! Why didn't you tell me that before?! I feel so much better! You're the best friend anyone could ever have!" She gave Suzanne a big hug.
Suzanne was proud of her cleverness. In actual fact, "belly" in the story was a reference to the woman getting pregnant, but Suzanne knew interpreting the word the other way would help Susan's conscience. She just hoped that Susan didn't carefully reread the story of Onan any time soon.
As they hugged, she said, "Hey, that's what friends are for. If you ever feel really bad again, just remember: 'It's better to shoot your seed down into the belly of your mother than on the ground.'" She muttered, "I think that wording works better."
"I will! I definitely will!"
After some more comforting talk and hugs, Suzanne pointed out that they still hadn't done their daily exercises yet.
Susan complained, "Who can exercise at a time like this?!"
But Suzanne was very persuasive, as usual, and convinced Susan they couldn't break their routine. Besides, she pointed out that the exercising would give Susan an opportunity to let out her frustrations on the exercise machines.
So they did their workout together. But the mood was quite different than how it had been during other exercise sessions lately. There was no sharing of sexy experiences, fantasies, or dreams whatsoever. Suzanne wanted to all the nitty gritty details about how the "abnormality check" had gone, but Susan didn't say a word about that. She was all business.
Suzanne was secretly frustrated, but she understood that it was prudent to be patient. Susan told her all her secrets eventually.
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